Accepting Survival Mode

by GettingFreedom on March 16, 2011

As women, we’re people pleasers.  As wives and mothers, we want to have it all together.  We have expectations for ourselves, and most of the time we can’t even attain it.

Some time ago, I was able to give up on the thought that I could do it all, all the time.  That didn’t stop me from dreaming of the day that I possibly could, though! Instead I had narrowed down what I was able to do on a regular basis.  Those things included: making my own cleaners, making most of our foods/meals from scratch using frugal recipes, gardening and canning what I could.

Survival Shelter

{Photo Source}

But, our world went crazy 9 months ago.  There’s not enough space to include everything that happened–but here’s the short version:

  • May: Vacation to Florida end of the month.  Van breaks down in Mississippi on the way home.  Rented Vehicle for drive back. {there’s SO much more to this mess!}
  • June: Home for roughly a week, and go into {very} unexpected labor with Blake at 2am.  Come to find out, my placenta abrupted.  Blake is in the NICU for 18 days, while our big kids stay with family part of the time, we’re in the City at the Ronald McDonald House.
  • July: Project Major Home Addition began April 12th, and was supposed to be finished no later than August.  Except, our rooms are barely framed in, the roof is on, and the siding is going up.  Very.Little.Progress.  Stress, Stress, and more Stress.
  • August: Grandmother passes away from Cancer.  We realize PMHA is not progressing as it should and we fire contractor.  Contractor takes us for thousands of dollars.  Father-in-Law steps in as new contractor, and we finally begin to see progress on the inside of the home. Oh, and school starts, as well as soccer!
  • September: We move out into the garage because our home is gutted, thinking it’ll only be until beginning of October. More soccer.
  • October: Continued work on the house, still no kitchen, and chaos is in full swing.  I’m the employee, the mother, the wife, and the maniac. :) Trying to keep normalcy for school and soccer.
  • November: We’re back into the house, but everything isn’t done yet.  Finally get a stove/oven by the end of the month.  Let’s throw in Thanksgiving, thankfully not at our home.
  • December: Right before Christmas, find out my mom has swelling and bleeding on the brain–she spends Christmas in the hospital.
  • January: Mid month, Mom has brain surgery to remove a tumor.  Find out it is indeed Stage 4 cancer, and it’s spread to her brain from her lung.
  • February: Mom develops an infection in her brain, and they preform another surgery to remove it, and part of her skull.  Rigorous chemo/radiation schedule begins at the end of the month and continues…..

During those times I had to accept Survival Mode.  I had to take a step back, and look at what was really important, and what absolutely had to be done. It wasn’t easy giving up on my day to day tasks.  I no longer needed my Home Management Binder because there was no time,  no home, and no schedule.  I couldn’t make meals without a kitchen, let alone make them from scratch.  Although, I was getting pretty good at using a microwave! {You have to read the post linked, if you haven’t already, to find the amount of humor in that statement!} Instead, our dinners were spent boosting the local economy.

When life gets crazy, step back and realize that it’s just a short season of your whole life.  You have the rest of your days to perfect your cleaning and cooking schedules and dreams.  During these times of upheaval your family needs you, not your bread and natural cleaners.

Accept Survival Mode.

Your family will thank you.  And in the end, you’ll be happy you did!

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